Wednesday, March 09, 2005

ISTA Donates 350 Teachers to Keep Peyton in Indy

Recognizing the Indiana Legislature's position on raising taxes for important reasons only, the Indiana State Teacher's Association (ISTA) has stepped up to the plate and finally agreed to sacrifice 350 teacher positions and 7,000 kids, in order to keep Peyton Manning in Indiana. This, in combination with tax increases to other Hoosier patrons, may help keep the rest of the Colts in Indy as well.

An ISTA spokesman stated, "We figure 350 teachers at the bottom of the scale, with all health benefits, is $40,000. Since 350 X 40,000 = 14 million, we figure this will save $14,000,000.00 dollars a year. This should be about right for one really good quarterback who almost went to the Super Bowl once. At least we can do our part to follow the lead of government officials and try to keep the Colts in Indy. It has been very trying but we have finally accepted the fact that the legislature only considers tax increases for important things."

He explained, "We recognize that the Indiana Legislature has set it's priorities out for the public to see and we realize how important it is to Indiana to keep the Colts in Indianapolis and the Irsays "in the money." Football is very important to our culture and way of life. It will also be of increasing importance to those that have lost their jobs due to layoffs. They can still watch football if they have electricity."

He added, "The only thing that bothers us is that the Colts payroll went from $54,183,800 in 2000 to $74,998,224 in 2003. This is a 38% increase in personnel costs. We hope at some point that they will be "fully funded." This pales in comparison to the increases in education, but we realize that we must do our part to help the Blue Nation."

A spokesperson in the governor's office stated, "We used to think the ISTA was just a collective bargaining group concerned with teacher wages and the welfare of children. But it is nice to know that under that tough exterior beats a true heart of compassion for the things that many of our legislator's value."

4 Comments:

At Wednesday, March 09, 2005, Anonymous Rock said...

This is a crazy proposal by ISTA. Everyone knows that hockey is what Indianapolis really needs. Think about it, with the NHL season derailed, we can bring in a hockey team dirt cheap. Maybe ISTA can add another 50 teachers to that list. I would guess that for 100 teachers we could get a good NHL team like the Blackhawks. Then, for the other 300 we could build an a** kickin' rink downtown Indianapolis. Now, that's efficiency.

 
At Saturday, March 12, 2005, Anonymous NEA observer said...

ISTA and the rest of the NEA are always willing to sacrifice classroom teachers, aren't they.

Founded as a professional association for school superintendents and teachers in the mid-1800s, the NEA was transformed into a powerful labor union by the 1960's.

Now, with funds deducted directly from the paychecks of its 2.7 million members--and non-members, too--the NEA has an annual budget of more than $1 billion.

NEA and ISTA follow the proud dictum of former AFT President Albert Shanker, "When school children start paying union dues, that's when I'll start representing the interests of school children."

 
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